Monday, October 26, 2009

The Crystal House, "Day 84"

Lately I've been going out and doing stuff, but it isn't the usual stuff. It's not hanging out with friends, eating out, watching movies, or anything typical. Whatever perception typical carries. I've been to spiritual retreats, had deja vus, and meaningful and symbolic premonitions that have led to unique experiences unlike any other. I went to what's described as a Crystal House filled with spiritualists. It's a beautiful and uniquely energized home filled with crystals that attract spiritualists.

Each week offers a new and exciting experience. My friend has had the pleasure of reiki treatment one week and aura picture reading in another. Since we arrived so late, we only witnessed an interesting debate about how much influence we have over our own destiny. I was hypnotized by the generous crystal collection. I spent the rest of the evening talking to the woman who opens her home up. She shared her stories behind what led her to this spiritual experience.

Arriving so late I was unable to get a picture reading of my aura because the camera was already shut off. Apparently you place your head on a machine connected to a monitor that displays colors that represent your aura. I became excitedly obssessed by the idea of knowing my aura. I was suggested to talk to another woman who reads chakras.

This is also the same woman who wore this stunning necklace. It looked familiar and felt like it carried history. My focus just got consumed by that accessory. I'm not sure why. After a while, some of the people present felt familiar and comfortable. It wasn't quite a deja vu, though. That entire evening was interesting. As I saw the house, I felt a powerful connection to it before I even knew which house we were going to. Then the woman wearing the necklace looked familiar, but that feeing was quickly replaced by the necklace I couldn't help be intrigued by.

Another interesting experience I had of her was that she felt different to me than the others who were there. I'm still not sure why. I felt like she was powerful and connected. My focus went towards the source of her power. It didn't feel pure, but it didn't feel dangerous, either. It actually triggered a conversation I had with a friend. He said that I should be careful with experimenting with witchcraft because I have powers, and I can do some harm since it comes from a dark source. I've always had this dark fascination to the craft contained by a sense of undefined hesitation. I'm cautious about the idea of harnessing my powers, but I don't fear my premonitions, although I do believe that it comes from the same source. My friend explained that my visions come from the same dark place, but I have to learn to control it because it's a part of me. No one said I have to use it for something bad.

That memory disconnected me from the woman briefly. As I returned to the present, I felt soft energy and an absence of danger. I beieve that it's possible her powers come from a dark source or has been contaminated in something dark, but she transcended beyond that. I don't know if that's true or not, but something in me focused on her because she was familiar. I find that curious.

Anyways, I asked her to read my chakra. She said my root chakra is fine. For the first time in my life, I have a strong basic foundation. I was surprised because experience has unfavored the structure and solidity of my foundation. Yet I wasn't surprised by this assessment. My saccral chakra is blocked. I was suggested to draw or paint because I'm creatively stifled. Very accurate. As she began exploring my solar plexus, I felt her reaction, a strong sense of knowingness and unbreakable certainty. She said, "God, do you laugh?" Except it was asked in a rhetorical sense with an apparent understanding that the answer is no. I've actually been intentionally excluded from comedy houses because my silent laughter as I call it made others uncomfortable. My roommate joked that she's going to tutor me on funny, and I'm looking forward to beginning those lessons. On some level, I knew that my inability to recognize and function properly in a humorous setting was stifling somehow, but I didn't know it affected me so deeply. I was also suggested to sing as a way to be less in my head. I have to spend more time with the trees, which really spoke to me because active meditation is most beneficial for me. I actually like walking in an isolated area surrounded by trees. She said that I should trust my heart more, that it's important. I also have to stand up for myself. She emphasized the importance of quieting my mind and minimizing my anxiety because I need to refine my emotional control. I have an active third eye, which means that I'm intuitive and am clairvoyant. I get visions through sight, but it's important because it's activated that I learn to reduce anxiety and not overthink as a way to anchor my emotions. She stresseed that a lot. She said that or else it's like a stack of bricks slamming down, and it's too much. She said all I need to do for my anxiety is to breathe more. Even in the next week or two, I should be more conscientious of my breathing.

A friend of mine and the most laid-back person I know suggested breathing exercises for me on a day I was having difficulty managing the overload of visions I was getting. It's interesting because I was experiencing a dizzying amount of visions of him, through him, because of him. The very source that triggered this was also the same source that neutralized it and recommended breathing exercises. I can feel his emotional openness and receptivity. It was the process he used that led him to the same suggestion the spiritualist recommended.

It was great to hear that from a stranger because I felt more secure in the idea of believing in my visions. Everything she said was dead on. She also observed that my friend and I are opposites, which is why we have a balancing effect on each other and why we're so close. That was exciting and interesting to hear because we did bond quickly and we do have a friendship, but that was the second time we hung out. The spiritualist sensed this strong, lasting and existing friendship in us, but we just started hanging out. That was really inspiring and awesome.

So I'm going to put the effort to draw or paint. I can only afford to draw at this point in my life, but I'm attracted to the idea of painting. I have a couple visions already in mind. I'm also going to sing more. As soon as my dry skin heals, I'm going to take more walks along a trail by my apartment that's surrounded by trees. Breathing exercises frighten me, but that's something I'll have to face. I didn't have a spiritual experience; I had a spiritual intervention, but I hope to have one soon.

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