Tuesday, March 20, 2012

Happy Spring!

Today is the first day of spring! I went to yoga class last night and arrived much earlier than anticipated, but it gave me an opportunity to read. That's something I've neglected, so I'm grateful for the time that opened up to me. It's been startlingly cold, but it got a little less intense on the freeze factor, so I could read outside. I went home sleepy and went straight to bed.

I woke up this morning to cook myself sauteed shrimp with ginger, garlic, lemon pepper, and red pepper flakes. Yum! I feel like I prepared for spring properly last night and the effects carried over this morning. I just realized that I began monitoring my mood to see if it relates to the moon cycles, but I haven't been doing it daily as I told myself I would. I guess I'll start on that after this entry...

The company I work for is interviewing candidates for my position. If an appropriate replacement isn't found, this job is mine. Sometimes I find myself vulnerable to insecurity, but I'm handling it surprisingly well because I'm really starting to believe that if this doesn't work out, a different opportunity will present itself. it's comforting to believe that it won't just end in despair and failure as if it's the end of the world. It never was but I have this auto-reflex thought trigger. I'm guarding myself against it.

It's been helpful that the candidates don't seem like a threat to me. Some of them haven't sounded very professional over the phone or come off a little offputting and needy right off the bat. Quite a bit of them have arrived in professional attire that doesn't fit their body well. You could tell they're desperate to make an impression that they're following the rule, rather than trying to be comfortable and naturally make a positive impression. For me it's evident how uncomfortable their attire is making them. I understand it's a job interview, so you want to appear professional, but that's a short-sighted, incomplete mentality.

There's more to it. You figure this is your potential employer. You want to be able to get along with these people. You don't want to present yourself one-dimensionally as a professionally operating machine. You have to present yourself in a pleasant way where they'd like to see you on a daily basis and believe that their clients will share that same experience. That stiffness in attitude they arrive with isn't doing them any favors. That's not to say that they can't do their job well, but these are just my thoughts.

One candidate appeared to have potential and one caller sounded very professional and impressionable. She might jeopardize my job security here. I wish this weren't the case. I'm glad I'm growing and I don't resort to a panic state of shock. But it's nice to have stability. I made friends here. I have access to internet and the freedom to use it. I can write. I can read. I have access to food and can eat at my desk. My job isn't at risk if I use the bathroom on an hourly basis cuz no one else can take over. I'm right by the yoga studio... I'm just saying...

Of course I'd be looking at a salary reduction cuz if I were to get hired, it wouldn't be through the agency that's employing me currently. That means I can't upgrade to a better apartment. That drawback made me strongly consider if I actually want this position because I feel stagnant. But this would be a great opportunity to study to become a Certified Holistic Nutrition Coach! Not to mention my astrological chart said I'd come across lucrative news in April. That's when I learn whether my job is secure or not! Then again it could mean a different lucrative position.

I'm not sure if I should be looking at other options or not. I know that statement sounds incredibly naive. Of course I should be, but it's not like I can attend of the interviews or that I should, I mean. Usually I find myself paralyzed by uncertainty, but this time my decision feels right. We'll see what happens.

My co-worker gave me candy in a pretty box. I love that!

A lot of small and random things have happened and as they occur, I think about how I'd like to blog about it. And yet when I'm sitting in front of the computer screen, my mind goes bank. LOL Oh yeah! I'm going to see a massage therapist this weekend cuz she's offering discounts for this month and is known to be phenomonal. I used to believe that massages were overpriced indulgences. But after experiencing a well-trained massage therapist, I've discovered that it can be medically beneficial. As someone who tenses easily and has a lot of knots, I find them to be immensely helpful. I find my body feeling lighter, I move more freely, and I get more range of motion. Since I'm naturally so incredibly flexible, I never realized how stiff the stress was making me.

I cancelled a facial to save money in case this job doesn't last. I find myself doing stuff like that and then I wait FOREVER to purchase anything. It's kinda sad, but it's also wise. With the massage it's different, though. There's a special going on and I really want to take advantage of it. I'm really looking forward to it.

Hopefully this job will be mine permanently. Then I plan to treat myself to a facial, cardio ballet classes, gemstones to fill my sink with, and a few other things. Well I think I'm finished blabbing for now.

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