I sent an email to a friend who moved away from here, updating him on the chaos of this life he left behind. It's crazy that he's gone. It's nuts what happens at this place. Yet I feel paralyzed in it. It used to be that craziness spiraled into insanity and chaos. I'd feel like I was going to fall off from a roller coaster I wasn't properly strapped in to. The abnormality of it all has turned into mundane. Lame! Something has to change.