Through Pain Comes Growth, Day 1

Through pain comes growth. That's how this blog was born. I'm going to turn poison into medicine. I can't suck the poison from my life, so all that's left for me to do is transform it into something else. With writing as my vessel, I'll take my pains, suffering, self-doubts, and insecurities to a whole new plane. I'm a writer at heart. If there's one thing I'm certain about, it's that.

I write all the time. It's as vital to me as breathing. Yet I've never truly written every single day. If someone who isn't a writer can take the time and make a commitment, I should be more than willing to dedicate my time towards something I truly enjoy. I don't want to put restrictions on myself, but my goal is to not write too extensively. That, in it of itself, will be a challenge. I don't want to be overwhelmed by this task. I just want to re-introduce structure back into my life. I want to take the time to do what I love.

I was inspired by a woman I don't know very well but respect. She re-defined her blog and created a 365 A Day Project where she blogs daily about the relationship between her life and her garden. Each day she hopes to understand the relationship between her own relationships and mother nature, the powerful circle of life. "Change is good for the soul, just so hard to accomplish."

Her entries reveal hidden pain and depth I never knew existed and strength in her ability to expose the vulnerability many of us try so desperately to conceal. It's an experience to see yourself in others especially those who you aren't very close with. It makes you look within yourself. After passively relating to her blog, I became inspired to create my own. I love her vision and how it interconnects and evolves as time passes. I want something like that for myself, but gardening doesn't speak to me.

I ultimately decided to go with Earth-Air-Fire-Water because they're individually strong elements that are interconnected to a greater vessel than themselves. Each element is destructive and powerful with equal abandon. Uncontrolled it becomes self-sabotaging but channeled properly, it flourishes. The imbalances can only be rectified as a unity. I'm not as familiar and bonded with Eastern philosophy as I would like, but that's something that speaks to me. I'm a strong individual, but my capacity to be powerful is equaled by my ability to be destructive. Only with the support of others am I able to find the inner balance I seek. My element changes from day to day, mood to mood. I may not incorporate these elements into every entry I make, but it's something I want to be conscientious of.